Here is what I wrote in 5 Minutes:
One of my biggest strengths is simultaneously one of my greatest weaknesses: can you relate to this?
I am extremely prolific. I write a lot. And then I forget what I wrote and it gets buried into the next thing I write and forget about and the pile of writing and forgetting eventually becomes overwhelming and I just bury my head in the “I can’t get anything done, I’m so ineffective” story at the helm of all those dear, meaningful microstories waiting for me to deliver them.
“If only I were brave enough,” I lecture me.
“The world is waiting for my words!” I shout from my feet to my belly.
“You had cancer, idiot, get a hold of yourself and do something,” which usually paralyzes me most effectively.
Please tell me I am not alone in this.
Please don’t pity me.
Please don’t edit my voice and make it wrong because I don’t write in the same style as you.
I lift my hands from the keyboard.
This story isn’t easy to write. I somehow have believed it has to be easy in order to be worth something, the flow has to be constant, never ending in order for it to have value.
I rub my hands together, micromovements, I hear in my head, “This is the church, this is the steeple” and the now almost fifty-five-year-old me says, “Open the door and love all the people.”
That’s what I do with my story. That’s what I will do with this story and others.
Love other people.
Love other people into the wonder of their stories.
Love other people into ending their blocks in writing, their roadblocks of belief, their micro-or-mini-terrors at the smallest wobbles or the earthquakes or the car accidents or whatever version of “Turn and Run” they have.
Look at that. The applause-timer sings. Just like that.
Wow. I’m onto something.
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Julie Jordan Scott
is the founder and creator of 5For5BrainDump. She has been inspiring artistic rebirth since 1999.